Friday, January 25, 2013

Getting out of bed...

If you do not have to go to work, or have an appointment, or really anything to do, what gets you out of bed at a decent time?

For me, I can't seem to find any reason to get out of the bed unless I have work or an appointment. I will go to sleep at 10pm and wake up between 8am and 10am. Maybe I'll change out of my PJs into comfy clothes, but I am still in bed. I give the cat their meds (yes, for the next week both kitties are on meds...one oral syringe, the other ointment in the ear) but then back laying down on the bed. I watch TV.  I make a simple lunch which I then proceed to eat, you guessed it, in bed, laying down. I then lay in bed and watch TV until its time to go to work. I don;t even bother to get one of the dozen DVDs I have yet to watch, I just watch whatever show is on reruns that I feel like watching. Mindless stupid TV. I procrastinate any chores until the last minute and they only get done if assigned on the "chore board" I had him set up for me.

 I go to work. I feel ok, I enjoy my job. I'm lazy and don't walk any further than I have to most days, I have often called the office from the bus in the yard rather than walk back to the office (it's really not that far). I drive my bus, rarely do I get out of the seat unless forced to by a needy passenger or to assist a wheelchair passenger. Doesn't matter if the shift is 2 hours or 8 hours...I don't move unless I have to.

I am thinking, well I know, this is definately not a healthy way to live. Luckily, I don't just lay here and eat a bunch of food all day, I stick with lunch and dinner and maybe a snack for breakfast. But I don't move.

But how do I get out of bed? I have no where to go. Nothing appeals to me other than laying here. I am most comfortable laying down. I actually struggle to eat at home sitting on the table. My husband eats like a human at the desk, and I eat like I don;t even know, laying down in bed. It's pathetic. People my age should want to get out and do things. My new schedule has made this issue even worse as I usually don't go to work until after 3pm and am home again by 7pm. I don't feel like i have time to do anything before work, when I actually have hours, especially if I got my lazy ass out of bed.

I have been diagnosed with depression, and I am on a new medication which has made my relationship better and me more level with my mood. However it has not gotten my lazy ass motivated to get out of bed.

I dunno what to do. It's a pathetic, unhealthy existence.


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